Commas are like a choo-choo train

I help my clients with writing tips. Here’s one on commas:

When’s the right time to use a comma in a series of items in your sentence, and more importantly, when do you — not? Think of a series of items in a sentence like a freight train.

In a train, the first car is the engine. It pulls the entire train, is usually the most powerful car on the train and sets the tone for the experience.

The caboose brings up the rear. It’s bright red to let people know the train is done. Move along.

All the cars between the engine and the caboose mean money for the train; they’re carrying people, milk, petroleum or lumber. They don’t have the pizzaz of the engine and caboose (first and last), but they’re still important. 

So.

Think of a list or series in your sentence as a train. Put a comma between every train car in your series. Every single one except the one before the caboose. Instead of a comma, use and.

Imagine reading a series aloud: The commas tell you, hey, another car’s on the way. The and says, here’s the caboose.

“I’ll have one hot dog, one milkshake, one hamburger and french fries.”
“You’ll have nothing and like it.”

So there’s a difference of opinion about the Oxford Comma, which DOES put a comma before and before the caboose. The OC (Oxford Comma) is One’s Choice. The Associated Press does not use the OC. The Chicago Manual of Style does use the OC. Most business writing uses the OC, too. In these blog articles, I do not.

Make your choice with the OC. Use it or don’t. But be consistent throughout your writing. Don’t leave your readers wondering: Do they know what they’re doing?

Here’s another kind of train, this one for semi-colons. On this train, the cars themselves are filled with different items, so you save the commas for inside the train cars and semi-colons for between the train cars.

“My dream vacation would be going to Las Vegas, for gambling and pool-hopping; New York, for clubbing and baseball; and Paris, for the women, wine and museums. Now if I could only take a train …”

In a series with semi-colons, and there’s a series inside one of the cars, the and goes inside the caboose.

Does this seem like too much trouble? Digital marketing has encouraged readers to scan large text block. Commas give some visual hesitation and encourage readers to slow down and watch the train go by.

– Tom Sakell